I hate your blog! :)

[mjp]

A fancy new book chock full of special, mystical mantra-like words tailored specifically to you!

Or - a printed rehash of the smog.net blog - you decide!

Okay, so it is a rehash of the smog blog, but considering that it's made up of the "best" of almost seven years of rants and genius insight, who could resist? I mean, really. As an added bonus, all of the typos have been fixed, and the entries "de-bloggified" (term courtesy of Jordan Hurder, used with permission, copyright 2009) for your protection and convenience.

A fat little pocket sized book that you can read at the coffee shop while looking forlorn and waiting for pretty girls to strike up conversations with you. The perfect prop and twenty first century accessory!

"What IS that weird thing?"
"Oh, this? It's a book."
"Booook...? Book! Ha ha. That sounds so funny! Um...how do you turn it on?"

Available only at mjpbooks.com - accept no substitutes!

 

[bospress.net]

I hope that I got my order in first.

Very cool!

Bill.

p.s. I just realized that I have all of MJPs books, broadsides, etc, except the ultra rare Desert Dog chapbooks. I guess that makes me one of mjp's bitches... The trolls were right all along!

 

[hoochmonkey9]

hey! sign mine and draw it up real pretty.

please and thanks.

 

[mjp]

I hope that I got my order in first.

You did indeed. This might be a good time to tell you that I don't really have any copies yet. Ha. But I should by tomorrow.

I just realized that I have all of MJPs books, broadsides, etc, except the ultra rare Desert Dog chapbooks.

There's some other weird stuff that isn't on that site. Some small broadsides and stuff. I have a checklist here (because I am in love with myself...or I am forgetful and disorganized, one of the two...you decide) and it looks like 19 "A" items (for the bibliographically inclined) and there are a few of those that I don't even have a copy of.

You're not supposed to end a sentence with "of," are you?

 

[zenguru]

You're not supposed to end a sentence with "of," are you?

Not unless you're a poet. Which, of course, you are. As are we all.

Screw grammar!:D

 

[jordan]

no hardcover with tipped in ink poem?

you fucker. blah blah blah you're slipping blah blah blah something about swiss cheese.

 

[bospress.net]

if he sends me copies (and money, of course) I can make a hardback edition...

I'm just sayin....

Bill

 

[nervas]

Sweet! Having mine sent to my work, so my damn neighbor doesn't steal it and claim that my OTHER neighbor stole it!

 

[number6horse]

Just ordered and looking forward to reading it. Why did you blow up the blog anyway ?

As a teen, we had a "Rialto Theater" in our town. It was the "cool" movie-house because they showed midnight movies with "3-D Stewardesses", etc. And the management never seemed to mind the empty beer cans we left behind.

 

[mjp]

no hardcover with tipped in ink poem?

It is my radical statement for 2010 to have this thing appear in only one unspectacular version.

It was not an easy decision to make or an easy plan to carry out, I assure you. The temptation to tart up a few copies for fun and profit was strong. But no - this is my art. This is my statement.

Thank you, planet earth.

Why did you blow up the blog anyway?

It's hard to explain why. I had been threatening to close it for some time when Jordan asked to use one of the pieces for the Chance Press wedge book, so it seemed like a message from GOD. Or Oakland. But wherever the inspiration came from, it was the right time to pull it.

I don't want to be the last "blogger" left when the big web 2.0 party fizzles out. I don't want to be a "blogger," period. That explains it as well as I'm able. Ha.

 

[mjp]

A box of these arrived at the enchanted castle today, so the first orders will go out tomorrow. Thanks!

 

[LickTheStar]

Just how tight should my pants be (not to mention how hip my facial hair) to order this?

 

[mjp]

People of any pants persuasion can enjoy the book, as it cuts a wide swath of joy across all of our self-imposed sartorial boundaries.

Funny you should bring up pants though, as they are mentioned in the introduction.

 

[LickTheStar]

Well this seems like a worthwhile investment. I didn't even realize you had closed your blog. I'm sorry, I'll be a better peon in the future.

Which ball should I suck first?

 

[mjp]

Boy, I don't know. You should probably ask someone in Griffith Indiana. They seem to have a real insight into the inner workings of the forum over there.

 

[nervas]

Got mine today! Best thing to happen to me all day, cause everything else sucked today! I love the pocket size style!

Skinny jeans rule!

 

[mjp]

Damn, that was fast. You might be first. If I had a prize, I would award it. I don't have anything, but I'll make pancakes next time you're in the neighborhood.

 

[nervas]

(There's Gonna Be A) Showdown.... was awarding enough! Damn, that was awesome! You had me going there, till I got to the Jack Nicholson and blondes in their underpants. It's there I thought, whhhaaatttt...

wait, I think I also thought that during the limo ride to the store! HA, anyway, classic.

 

[mjp]

Thanks, man!

 

[hoochmonkey9]

mine came today, but my wife immediately snatched it away and started reading it. so, I have to wait my turn.

I do what she says. I owe it to her, because she has to put up with me. poor girl.

but the cover looks nice!

 

[bospress.net]

so far it is a great read. I have read 8 or 9 entries so far.

Bill

 

[mjp]

Muchas gracias, hermanos.

I hope it doesn't come across as too negative. But I explained (hopefully) in the introduction that I usually turned to the blog when I was pissed off about something. So the overall tone was not exceptionally gleeful.

I'm not a good judge because I think it's all a goof, and the humor is supposed to be there, even if it's couched in fist-waving.

 

[Gerard K H Love]

Fist waving? No, that's not you at all.

I'm waitng to steal one fromthe library. The giant library where I live doesn't have even one book by Bukowski.

 

[bospress.net]

Muchas gracias, hermanos.

I hope it doesn't come across as too negative. But I explained (hopefully) in the introduction that I usually turned to the blog when I was pissed off about something. So the overall tone was not exceptionally gleeful.

I'm not a good judge because I think it's all a goof, and the humor is supposed to be there, even if it's couched in fist-waving.

Some of your best stuff is when you are pissed. Just like when you mix it up with a troll on this board. Good stuff.

Bill

 

[justine]

apparently we purchased and received a copy of this, but i have yet to see it...

 

[mjp]

That's tragic, and it drives home the important idea that people should buy one copy for every adult and child in the home, so as to avoid a horrible predicament such as yours.

Let that be a lesson to all of you.

 

[LickTheStar]

Women and children first, of course.

 

[hoochmonkey9]

I'm 90 pages into it.

it's a cranky old punk writing with a sense of humour.

good thing I like that sort of thing. otherwise, I'd come looking for a refund. you know what I mean.

 

[mjp]

Yeah, I know what you mean. Good thing for both of us. I'd never get rich like I am now if I was constantly giving refunds.

 

[hoochmonkey9]

just finished it. very good stuff. my favourite piece/bit is Blow them the full watts tonight, because it sums up mjp for me: fire and brine and insight and laughs. that's the way to roll in this life, my friends.

I took a ride with the pretty music and Jackie is a punk rocker are probably the two best (different from favourite) pieces in the book. for me at least. and any bits mentioning The Clash/Joe Strummer and The Stooges. heh.

anyway, recommended. if you were on the fence about this one, take the leap. it's well worth the $348. that's how much it is, right? at least, that's what my paypal invoice said.